Project Love

Aim: To fall in love

Apparatus: Conducive environment, a bunch of friends, pen, paper, self-owned vehicle if available, sufficient pocket money (better if self-sustained), target

Theory and Motivation: This is the age of competition. Times today are much more trying than before. In view of the skewed sex ratios, and limited available opportunities, it is imperative than one be prepared in advance for to fall in love is no child's play. It requires pre-meditated effort, lots of patience and planning. not to forget backing of generous parents and friends. And while there may be those who'd choose to wait for things to take their own course remember,  God helps those who help themselves. One realises sooner or later that there is no alternative to plunging into the rat race.

Procedure:

1)  Identify: Though it may sound intuitively simple it is a tough choice. While making this decision please take the following factors into account
Long term or short term
Age
Intelligence Quotient (IQ)
Emotional Quotient (EQ)
Physical Quotient (PQ)

2)  Observe: Once the target has been identified and located, establish a 1-2 week observation schedule. This period should be utilised for stalking the said object in every possible manner. Care should be exercised that the target not be aware of such suspicious activities. This is also the time for extending your friend circle, creating new friendships and alliances, waking up those old ones gathering dust and also establishing general goodwill amongst the masses. Ensure that no anti-self elements are able to approach within a 5 mile radius of the target. The last line will ensure that you do not face any difficulties in the further parts of the experiment.

3) Approach: Now is the time for you to establish personal contact with the target. Do not get to step 3) until you have accustomed yourself to stalking and seeing the target. Hormonal surges may not always culminate  into step 4). Be as casual and cool in your approach as possible. Keep your friends at bay during such activities as they are susceptible to creating embarrassing situations for you at such times. Carry one or two confidantes if needed but remember that the toughest battles in life have to be fought alone.

Note: Cheesy dialogues from corny movies are a strict no-no unless approaching target with a very low IQ or a very high EQ.

4) Habituate: Habituate the Target to you. Turn-up around the target at every opportunity and increase interaction times.

5) Visible Stalking: Make the target aware of your special interests. Visibly stalk the target. Methods of stalking may differ from case to case. It may not appear as stalking to the target at this phase, as by this time, he/she would already be habituated to you.

6) Confession: Well if you are at step 6, first pat yourself. This is the step when you finally let your heart rule over your head, and for that one moment let yourself and the target believe that it is indeed a Yash Raj Film, this, is that decisive moment. You voice out your version of those revered “magical” three words and wait for a miracle.

7)If you are still reading well am guessing there was no miracle. From here you have three choices , Start over, Wait , or try the RDA routine

RDA or the typical Retract Disorient and Attack routine, where you retract from your stance of step 6, Disorient/disturb the target, and attack with step 6 when the target has sufficiently weakened.

Well if you chose to wait, you have a 5 % chance of being lucky , o a 95% chance of havin to start over... and if you are starting over, i don’t want to get into probabilities.

               
And if the miracle did happen...Voila Target achieved.. 

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P.S.  The bold-underlined letters convey a hidden message