Psychedelic Slippers

25 is a funny age to be. Especially when it just turns the tables and you know nothing that you knew any more. Everything has changed. You tell yourself, “It has changed for Good”. And you define good in your head. Yet in your weakest of moments you transport yourself to the safety of two arms, that are now just in your head, but they tell you it will be okay. That your world is what it was. That you aren't a homeless wanderer, that there is a home, there is a pair of arms. They tell you and you believe them. And you sleep off in their comfort, only to wake up the next day and Break your heart all over. It’s the price of freedom, you tell yourself. This feeling of homeless, you have to live with it. And that searing pain you feel, you wonder if its regret or hope. But you hope it’s neither. Where is freedom you scream, and then you run. Yet nothing moves, and you wish you could run in time instead and days would fly forward, or fly back. That you could transport yourself to ...

"When you drop a glass or a plate to the ground it makes a loud crashing sound. When a window shatters a table leg breaks or when a picture falls off the wall it makes a noise. But as for your heart when that breaks it s completely silent. You would think as it s so important it would make the loudest noise in the whole world or even have some ... Read Moresort of ceremonious sound like the gong of a cymbal or the ringing of a bell. But it s silent and you almost wish there was a noise to distract you from the pain. If there is a noise it s internal. It screams and no one can hear it but you. It screams so loud your ears ring and your head aches. It trashes around in your chest like a great white shark caught in the sea it roars like a mother bear whose cub has been taken. That s what it looks like and that s what it sounds like a trashing panicking trapped great big beast roaring like a prisoner to its own emotions. But that s the thing about love no one is untouchable."  ...

I don't remember how old I was then, could have been 6-7 or 8. There were these bunch of play mates i had, who would always bully me, and I would rush crying home every evening. I would keep cribbing i don't have friends. ( I have always been obsessed with that word i presume) , so one fine evening, dad picks up a story book, puts it in my 3" palms and says, "Here, books are your best friends, they will never let you down". I don't know if it was my blind faith in everything that dad said, that i took the words so much to heart. But from then on till date, they've stayed by my side. Faithfully. Through thick and thin, time and again, i've found solace in books, from adventures in the magic faraway tree, to Santiago's (ref. Alchemist) desert odyssey. They have advised me, in the most exquisite ways. They have taught me to fight, love and empathize. They have always opened my heart for this one other perspective, that one can always accommodate. ...

Finally laid my hands on this classic. The book's a fine read. After years i finished a book over a weekend. The book is about 2 kids coming to terms with things around them. Through Jem and Scout the author paints the world through the children's eyes. Where everything is black or white, and there are no shades of grey. This conversation between Jem and Scout , i feel , is the crux of this book. "Jem kicked off his shoes and swung his feet to the bed. He propped himself against a pillow and switched on the reading light. 'You know something, Scout? I've got it all figured out, now. I've thought about it a lot lately and I've got it figured out. There;s four kinds of folks in the world. There's the ordinary kind like us and the neighbours, there's the kind like the Cunninghams out in the woods, the kind like the Ewells down at the dump, and the Negroes.' 'What about the Chinese, and the Cajuns down yonder in Baldwin County?" ...

How to come to terms with your past? It’s a question that probably haunts many of us and we choose our own ways. It was a crazy night, last one. We sat talking through it. Whether there was a real need, m not sure, but then it had to be done. I was supposed to start, I wasn’t sure how to, I placed a question. And he drifted ten years back for answers. His journey was detailed, steady, slow. He remembered the good, the bad. He wept. When we build relationships, and when we fight for them, for a long time, the roots go deep. I was smiling. May be I wanted him to feel where those roots are. But he prefers to dump those thoughts away and move on. I am smiling. My story is haphazard. There’s no start or end. I pick up stories from memory and tell him. I am not sad. I can only smile at the pure joy in those moments. I can only smile at his innocence, and feel happy for it. That it was a part of my life, once. I can’t remember the fights, the quibbles. I can remember they happen...

I like to think that we’ve met before. That there was a whiff of you when you passed by there.. and there was a second glance. That there was a point in time and space where our paths first met where you held my a gaze a millisecond longer that I felt it and you did too... I like to believe it started then, there. When our fates first met, and chose to twine I like to believe its more than just coincidence You, me, the stars, they were meant to be!

Once in a lifetime, you have to raise your hand, stand up and say “It’s done with”! It’s hard. Its hard to accept the need to do so, in the first place, its harder to raise your hand and make yourself stand, its even harder to find your voice when on your feet. But for that once, you have to do it. You have to do it for that tiny feeble voice that says ‘go on, you are right’.There are no reasons, just gut feelings, which tell you what should and shouldn’t be done. It hurts. Its like pulling off the cable and saying game over, when the other is probably enjoying the game. Sometimes you see it coming, sometimes you don’t. Love can make you believe the impossible. Love can make you do things and not do things. Love can drive you crazy. It’s all a matter of choice. Whether you choose to let love rule your life and run it, or whether you are adamant to get a grip on the reins. Whether you are content with the happiness in someone’s eyes or whether you need to feel it in your heart to...