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21.. n runnin (i guess)

"i kept runnin behind something, i thought, was pullin me
today i see, wat kept pushing me, was something else "

i spend a lot of time lookin behind these days. its last year, n its like a lot is slipping out from between ur fingers. a lot that u want to hold to... a lot u never wanna let go.

i have come far from the tomboy i once claimed to be. somewhere given in to what society expects u to be, n the so many people around u. sometimes i feel i m walkin bac though, to my times b4 i turned into a tomboy.
i spent the first 2 years of coll life tryin to find a place fr me in a RIGHT group, they were a waste.. i was tryin to break barriers, fit into prototypes, tryin to shape myself n others. i gave it one last try in third year, n i think now i hav succumbed to things.

i dunno if its succumbing to circumstances, or jus the desire to be left alone fr sometime. i loved the centerstage once. i lived life there, i loved the attention.now i prefer to stay away.

but one thing has remained constant.. i have lived every moment with my heart.

my heart outruns my writing once again....

"Here I am, lost in the ashes of time, but who owns tomorrow?
In between the longing to hold you again
I'm caught in your shadow, I'm losing control
My mind drifts away, we only have today
"

Comments

nishi said…
i din get wat was the excellent fr!

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