They tell you the 20’s are good years. Freshly out of college,
you are all set for the world. That’s where everyone starts anyway. Then work –life
happens, or post-graduation happens, or something such. For the first two years,
(of whatever you choose), you live with a gusto. You are an adult, (by almost
everyone’s standards) and you have this new sense of freedom. The
responsibilities haven’t yet clouded your dreams. You are hopeful, still. Some
have just cracked out of their shells (called home) and they are experimenting.
Others turn more reckless with their experimentation. Everyone’s still
searching though, looking for that niche where everything feels in place. You
try a lot of new things. It’s not like college any more where you had to look
over your shoulder each time you wanted to try something new. And before you
know, in a frenzied rush to make the best of your times … bammm!!! You hit the 25 mark.
And then life changes… (almost overnight). You are bogged
down by wedding invites. There is an incessant bombarding of couple photos on
your timeline. Everyone’s either into, out of, or trying to get into a
relationship. The first few bachelor parties are fun, but then they become
routine too. Your phones default mode is “Important messages only”. You know
most of your friends through updates on social media. You suddenly notice the “freshers”
around you, and you see that look in their eyes, that look you gave the “senior”
whilst you were a fresher. That word emboldens itself in front of your eyes “Senior”.
You think of updating your resume and making
a shift, but before you get to that you have to deal with the wedding resumes.
Your parent’s are retiring or are dreaming of retiring and that thing called “responsibility”
starts nudging you, slowly, in your most peaceful moments.
They tell you all this about the 20’s . What no one talks
about, are the incredibly long hours you will spend with yourself, “alone” (be
it at work, at home, anywhere.) No one tells you that after spending forever forging
relationships, you have to now learn to be without most of them. You have to
learn to live a life where no one’s really bothered about your everyday. Where
you fall into a mundane routine, and there will be days at end, when nothing is
really happening. Everyone else’s life will feel infinitely more happening than
your own. It’s a hushed secret, really. We all feel this way (on the other side
of 20s), but we hide it by telling the world a story glorifying our routines
(and hoping we fall for it ourselves). The challenge is not so much in being
alone, but to not let being alone, make you feel lonely. The challenge is to
accept the solitude, to be okay with it and to make the best of it.
So, how does one do that, you may ask. I really don’t know.
Still getting there.
Comments